Cancer in Kerala and the greatest Irony

"Life is the greatest irony. "

I happened to read an article recently in the newspaper stating how badly the air is polluted by the chemicals thats been excreted by the industries. The life seems to get a halt when the air water and the land that we live get unsuitable for day to day life. I dont need to worry about the air in kerala, thanks to the political parties for their constant labour strikes that hinder the industrialist to give a shot here , but i need to be worried about the food i take. Most of the food that we consume here is rich in minerals metals and toxins .
Why we are deprived of the right to live?
The number of cancer cases that has been reported in recent past has raised to a new level, a level that seem to be impossible for the other states like karnataka and tamil nadu can ever imagine to surpass. Why its getting difficult or them to challenge these numbers set by my state. The reason is the green vegetables, oh sorry let me para phrase it again, the toxic vegitables . They are being exported regularly to kerala and it get so difficult for them to retain it back, for the good neighbours, i mean the vegetable sellers of kerala, are so concerned about the health of the the people of karnataka and Tamil nadu that they wont allow any of the waste to remain there. they just buy it all and sell in my state.
What do they achieve?
They buy cancer and sell it here, we dont have any choice but to buy it for high money. Why are these shop owners so greedy, you cant just question their good intentions.Can we? They are earning to save it for the time when problems hit their family, like medical bills. One need to be sure one is prepared to meet the medical expenses, They need to give the best treatment when their kids fall ill. And ofcourse their children will fall ill(God forbid). And they will get what their father is selling. what are these shop owners thinking when they sell the fruits and vegetables to the poor people of Kerala, that they could insulate their family from these waste and toxins, to make an invisible cloak around them that may repell all these. How stupid!!. Their kids too will go to the milk shake corner, the hotel around the street and they too will consume what shouldnt be consumed and will  fall ill. Then these greedy bastards can pay for their treatment with the money they got by selling the illness to their loved ones
And That is the greatest Irony!!

Lent me your eyes

The search we are on

will we find what is ours?

till we meet , we wont know

whats rightfully mine 

is you and Your's is I

but how much value do i have?

in my eyes i find none

Lent me your eyes ,my love

For i want to see myself worthy

At least for a moment

And if it is not now, then never i will

Hope

I remember going to sleep on a cold December night into my cozy bed ,i remember being happy, was it a dream or rather, was i awake? i cant distinguish between the reality and dream, because it doesnt matter today. For when i was awake i found myself tightly strapped to a chair , there was something pushed deep into my throat and my mouth was tightly gagged. I couldnt comprehend what happened during that short span, between the moment i closed my eyes and i opened it , my life was transformed.

I sat there in that dark room for hours, i wanted to cry out loud for help, but my voice died some where inside me, i asked myself what i did wrong , where it all went wrong? May be sometimes doing the right thing must be the new breed of wrong. After many hours of anxiety , fear and helplessness, i saw the door opening a little, the light from outside was getting into my room , it wasnt opened wide but it was open a little , little enough for the light to crawl into my eyes, and with light a new hope was born inside me, yes some one is coming for me, but then it closed, and again i was pushed deep into the darkness , that voidness

Days went by and the person on the other side came regularly letting the faint light to fall into me and then disappearing just like that.

All those days it wasnt the gagging , the tight rope , or the darkness that tormented me,but it was that 2 minutes , that hope budded inside me with each light ray hitting on me, and then crushing it when the door closed for that day. it hurt me the most.

Even today when the door opened , i knew it wasn’t going to be opened for ever …..

but i hoped …. And hope was the greatest punishment they had for me..

My Regret!

i waited ,and soon it was night
and i hoped for the day to break
but why? For i was sweating
in the hot sun the day has for me
and i hoped for night. but why?
I didnt like the night but still
I waited and waited and then
on a cold chilly night i became
Old. Regretting, hoping for night
And i died on a warm afternoon
Regretting , Hoping for the day

A polished glass window

And Without much thought, i asked myself
Why?
if only i knew an answer ,but.
life happened around me. was i included in it?
or was i just a spectator?
but how come i be a spectator
If i havent noticed whats happening
can someone be so blind when his eyes are normal
like looking out of a well polished trasparent glass
i looked out of the life
I didnt see my life passing away , flowing away
For my eyes were stuck at the distant sceneries
And once i was awake
I am now awake and the polishness
of the glass has been lost
now i can see the images of me in it
but the glass is old
And the sceneries are now all blurred

helpless

Their jealousy were fuming for years
And they were hungry for her flesh
thirsty for her tears
but little did she knew
for all were her friends

And on an unexpected day
when she was her most vulnerable and defenseless
they were all over her
and she watched their dagger
dripping her blood
peeling her skin, tortured her day and night

and when the dawn was near
they were all ready to leave
smiling at each other with relief
and then they dressed her wounds
wished her fast recovery
and bid goodbye

For they shall return when she is well
And all the while what i could do
was to stand there and watch
watch her suffer in their hands
And stand there and watch helplessly

But i wouldn't be righteous in my own eyes

I hope i have answers to your questions, i hope i know the way like the route to my home. but i am lost , lost in the lowest point of this valley, i am uncertain about each steps i take , the way ahead the people behind me , the people in front of me, i am blinded by the smog of uncertainity. the only thing that pushes me forward is that invisible force, that i call my god. I believe i may get into in wrong path , tread through stones and thorns but some how i will manage to get into the right path, because i am an instrument in his hands

"Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me."

I will rot here , the carcass would feed thousands of vultures, but as i take my last breath i shall not ask him why, because i know its not about me. In the bigger script of his I am not the Hero nor the villain I am just the Jr . artist who comes from nowhere and go to nowhere, but I will be thankful to him for allowing me a to play this role, and i will play it to perfection

"But i wouldn't be righteous in  my own eyes". let him judge and make the judgement